Number Nine

I read a series of parenting books once that explained how young children have six month cycles. Every six months they enter a new phase of being fun and enjoyable followed by six months of tough times and craziness. I’m not sure if it is actually true but at the time, I was grasping for anything to help me figure out what was happening as I became a mother for the first time. What I do know, is that being a parent can be pure bliss and joy, and it is also the most challenging and impossible feat I have ever faced. In all honesty, Eli have had our fair share of challenges since he was very little. I have learned that humans grow, evolve, heal and transform in the face of extreme challenges, so, that makes him my biggest spiritual teacher. I would have laughed at that before having him, but I have gained a lifetime of personal wisdom from this old soul. Despite our struggles, Eli and I seem to have a very strong one-on-one connection sometimes and particularly at this point in time. When we are out of house and alone together, he is happy, loving, cute (Oops! He hates being called that, but it slips out every once in a while!), respectful, confident, funny, and, no joke, I think he's more brave than I am because he has caught bigger waves than me this winter. ☺️ After many years of being worried about Eli, I can legitimately say I am proud of who he is and what he is becoming. I officially love this age, nine years old, and don't want him to grow up!

In thinking about how strong our relationship is right now, at his age of nine years old, and my age of 39, I remembered something significant. In numerology, the number nine represents integrity and wisdom among many other positive and negative qualities. Eli and I both share the number nine as one of our “birth numbers.” The life purpose of a "nine" when they are balanced, is to lead others through teaching and inspire by example, align their life with their heart’s intuitive wisdom, to live in accord with their highest integrity and are here to make a difference in the world. I am no numerology expert but for those who are, I am a 36/9 and Eli is a 19/10. There is a lot more to it and I find this type information reassuring and fascinating. For whatever it is worth, I notice we are as strongly connected now as we were when he was a newborn baby, loving each other’s company. I am going to make a point to get alone time with Eli as much as I can. I’m not sure how long this cycle will last.

Here's me and Eli after our surf session today, in the present moment. #surfdate #lunchdate #nineisthemagicalage


Love & light,
Kelowna

Freedom + Happiness = Success

Freedom and happiness are two of my ultimate goals in life. They are my why. They are what defines me. Just those words are like a breath of fresh air. That doesn't mean I am just floating around in bliss all the time but they are postitive words that embody what life should be filled with, in my opintion.

In reality though it looks more like, "Aaaah freedom!? Wait what do I do?!" Whenever I have free time and no plans, I have this moment of guilt and stress. It is like I am paralyzed by thoughts of what I "should" be doing. Working at home is a blessing, and it takes a lot of self-motivation. I always wonder, "What is the most important thing I should be doing right now?" Meditation, surf, exercise, eat, work, laundry, cleaning...and the to do list goes on! 

On Tuesday morning, I got my kids off to school, rode my bike down the street feeling giddy with the wind blowing in my hair and came home to prepare for my first day of FREEDOM after being with the kids 24/7 for their two week fall break. (Monday I was in meetings while the kids were in school).  My HAPPINESS was soon over come by the feeling of not knowing what to do first, so I turned to my oils. Of all of the essential oils on my shelf, I chose to roll some Highest Potential on my forehead, the top of my head and at the base of my neck, I gave myself a mist with Believe oil and water and took some deep breaths before I sat down at the computer to catch up. First, I checked my email where I noticed that Monday was the first day of the 21-day meditation series I signed up for weeks ago with Deepak and Oprah. My first thought was, "Dang it! I already missed day one!" But as I opened the email and read the message, lo and behold the topic for this 21-day meditation is believing in yourself and achieving your highest potential. No joke, I had just applied those two oils!! Hint, hint. Following the clear sign of what I "should" be doing I instantly stepped away from my computer and sat down to do the meditation. 

These daily Deepak and Oprah meditations in combination with using some new Freedom-Release and Freedom-Sleep oils for emotional balance, are really making me think (and dream!) deep about what determines true freedom, happiness and the feeling of being successful in life. What I notice seems simple. As long as I am nurturing myself and taking care of my own needs (surfing, sleeping well, eating clean, exercising, meditating etc.) I am constantly provided with opportunities to help others and I have the willingness and energy to do so. This brings me joy, feels sustainable, and this is how I seem to move forward in life. I help myself so I can be there to help others and this is true happiness and success in my eyes. 

On another note, I also notice that the very things that bring me the most worry and discomfort, are the things that I need to do most. Meditation, parenting my children, speaking in front of others when teaching classes, and even writing this post, are some of my biggest challenges, believe it or not!  I realize the challenging opportunities are the ones that propel me forward. Let me talk about meditation for a second. Meditation is NOT easy for me, it is one of the hardest things I have ever done. Sit still. Do nothing. Don't think. I would rather stick a needle in my eye! That being said, the more I meditate, the smoother my life becomes and the more balanced I am physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. So, even though it is one of my biggest challenges, I know it helps me cope because I can deal with difficult situations with greater ease and grace. For example, when my kid throws a tantrum, I don't match their level of out-of-controllness (yea, I made that word up) and I am not as triggered by it. Showing up, believing in myself, having confidence, challenging myself, working through the discomfort, facing my fears, taking a look inside myself when I am triggered by my kids behavior, and not ever giving up are what gives my life meaning. The gifts I gain from the "tough stuff" are far greater than anything I ever imagined. 

Each time I work through another layer of my own healing, especially on the emotional level with essential oils and meditation, my relationships with my children, my family, and my friends improve, grow deeper and I am more fulfilled, free, and happy. I am eternally grateful for the opportunities that life presents me with. I just need to remember, the tougher the challenge, the greater the gift. The gifts are freedom and happiness. Freedom + Happiness = Success!

Love,

Kelowna

Harper jumping off this reef is a reminder to me of how it feels to be free, confident, daring, ready for anything, happy and successful. 

 Ready 

 Set

Go

Sunset, Swami's beach November 2015

In the Eyes of a Child

Last week I was awakened by Eli crawling into my bed while it was still dark out, "I have an idea mom. Let's get up and go surf and then go out to breakfast. Remember our date?!" He was wide awake and super enthusiastic. My first thought, I was sure there was no swell and the usual spring time wind had been creating less than appealing surf conditions. On the other hand, Eli was in his second week of spring break, and I wanted to make sure he was having fun and staying active, (i.e. getting worn out as much as possible!) Plus, at our previous weekly family meeting, we had talked about different ideas for spring break and one of mine was to make special time alone for a "date" with each member of our family. When I expressed that, Eli wanted to make sure our date was a "surf date." In a loud whisper he broke in again, "Come on Mom, get up, it's gonna be fun!" I left my warm bed and a peacefully sleeping Paul and Harper with the intention of having some time to connect with Eli, regardless of the poor surf conditions.

Sure enough, we got to the beach and there was a mixture of on shore and south wind blowing which makes an undesirable bump on the water. There were lots of empty parking spaces, which is never a good sign. If the surf is good, it is packed no matter how early it is. As we pulled up, Eli jumped out of the car and as we did our usual surf check to suss out the conditions, I crossed my arms, shivered and just remained silent, while he said, "Looks fun and uncrowded! Let's go out!" 

We opened up the back of the car, suited up and headed down. As we hit the water, Eli was all smiles, "Ah, the water is sooo warm still." At this point, I realized that for each negative thought I had, he had something positive to say. He was right, it was warm, compared to the air and for the time of the year for sure. We paddled out and he immediately caught a wave, rode it all the way in and paddled back out still grinning, "This is fun, huh, Mom?!" In his eyes, it was just as fun as being out on the best day of surf. I smiled at his enthusiasm and said, "Yeah, it is nice to be out here with you." The only people out were 4 kayakers and 2 longboarders. The kayakers only ride waves at surf spots when it is uncrowded because they are big, akward and not well accepted by some surfers. We did catch quite a few bumpy, wind swell waves and some of them were fun. By the time we came in, everyone else had gone in too, all the kayakers and the surfers. He looked back at the empty surf spot, and then at me, and said the first non-postitive comment of the morning, "Oh man, no one out?! This must be like the worst day ever!" It was like he just realized how bad the surf conditions were. Then, I did what he had been doing all morning, and pointed out the highlights, "Hey, we surfed uncrowded waves, in warm water and we got a front row parking spot." He immediately caught my drift, smiled and said, "Yeah, and now we get to go to out to breakfast!"

I am grateful for my childen for helping me stay in the present moment and focus on what really matters. In the eyes of our children, it is all about connecting with them. For Eli, and I, the ocean is the place where we connect best, no matter what the conditions are like!   

These photos were taken last summer after Eli had spent 8 hours at the beach. 

I love his beachy look, and salt stained eyes.

Photos: Pam Birmingham

high-main·te·nance

adjective

1. needing a lot of work to keep in good condition.
2. 
   

My on-going intention is to create B A L A N C E in my life between all of the things I love. The only problem is, I love a lot of different things! :) I love to surf, prepare delicious homemade food, use my Champion Juicer and VitaMix as much as possible, be outside in the sun, have time alone, walk on the beach, read books to and play with my kids, Eli (8) and Harper (5), have family time, date nights with my hubby, Paul, go on vacations, make mala necklaces, draw mandalas, do yoga, go to Kettlebells class (this is new for me!), meditate, see my clients, hang out with local friends and stay connected to those not local, give and recieve Reiki, teach classes, study about healing crystals and essential oils, read inspirational books, keep my house organized (yes, I do love this!), and probably about a million other things. 

I also really love to help people, and I feel like that is my Dharma or purpose in this life. I know when I am getting out of balance because I feel depleted. I get depleted when I put others needs before my own needs (what?! moms putting others needs before their own?!) I have very high energy most of the time and feel like the Energizer Bunny, because I just "keep going and going..." However, I have learned that to create the balance that I am always seeking, I have put myself first. If I am getting enough sleep, eating well, surfing, exercising and meditating regularly, I am more kind and patient, calm and centered with my family, and I have plenty of energy to help others. "My Cup Runneth Over!" It seems like common sense but it I have learned that it takes a lot of effort to take care of myself. So being high maintenance, despite some of its negative connotations, is not only ok, it is neccessary for my maintaining my optimal health and achieving balance.

Love and light,
Kelowna

Roseta Circa 2000